Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Why I want to lose weight

I have finally surrendered to the fact that I can not lose weight on my own. Like others who have decided on weight loss surgery, I have tried every diet known to man and some not known. I have paid tons of money to doctors, weight loss plans, diet pills, diet food, low carb foods, protein shakes, you name it I have tried it.. well except for the surgery.

I know someone who has had the gastric bypass surgery and someone who has had the lap band. After the research I have done, I have decided to go with the Sleeve Gastrectomy. When it gets closer to the surgery, I will post more information about the Sleeve Gastrectomy.

I went out to eat with a friend last night for dinner. I have noticed now that I have made my decision, I have been watching the food I eat and know that I will not be eating the same very soon. It was last night that I decided to blog my journey.

I want to document all the reasons I hate being fat, so if there comes a time, especially right after the surgery when I am in pain, I can look back and remember why I did it.

Things I hate about being fat:
  1. Bathtime is very important to me. I don't have any problems getting into the bath, but getting out?? Ug. I get out like a fat person. I have to turn to my side and use all my body parts to help me get up.
  2. Getting up from sitting. This is basically the same whether getting up from a couch or car. They make fun of pregnant women who have to get up belly first. This is how it is for fat people too. You have to scooch yourself to the edge of the seat then basically get up belly first.
  3. Putting on shoes and socks. Being fat, we compensate. I love sandals that just slip on because then I do not have to feel so fat as when I have to bend and somehow get my shoes and socks on. I leave my shoe strings tied so all I have to do is put my foot in the shoe and move it around til my foot is in it. I still have to bend .. and when I say bend... I do not mean like how skinny people bend. I can't just bend my knee and have my foot be in any area where my hands can reach. I can bend over and touch my toes, but there is no way to lift them at the same time. When my shoes become untied out in public?? Holy cow. I have to find someplace where I can place my foot so that it is forced into a position that I can reach it.
  4. Bending over. This relates to the previous item, but continues on. Fat people can't bend like skinny people. A skinny person squats (daintily or manly) when they need to pick something up off the floor. Even if they bend at the waist to do it.. they bend their knees at the same time. A fat person bends at the waist with knees locked and hopes like hell they can reach whatever it is they need to reach on the floor.
  5. The toilet. I am not going into detail here. Lets just say I know I do things differently than a skinny person.
  6. Walking or excercising. I am not so sure things are so much different than a skinny person who is out of shape. My daughter who I would put in the "skinny" category - its like when you are older, everyone who is younger than you are kids - here if you are not obese, you are skinny. She walked up the same hill as I did and she was out of breath. Granted I was about to pass out.. but she was out of breath so I didn't feel as bad.
  7. Sleeping. I sleep with several pillows. I do this for several different reason, but all related to my weight. I sleep on my side, because of the weight and sleep apnea. I feel like I can't breath when I am sleeping on my back.
  8. Sex. A guy I really really do not like (not because he said this) once said to me: "You just do not fit together as well when you are fat." This is true. I would only date guys who were not overweight, because I thought .. two fat people?? Impossible!! Well I have dated overweight guys. Its not impossible, BUT uncomfortable. How can you enjoy something if you are having to move your stomach because its sticking to the other's stomach? You want to put my legs where?? Remember the toys Weebles? The slogan Weebles wobble but they don't fall down? It seems to come to mind alot at this point. I could really get into some funny things that happen because of being fat, but my kids might read this.
  9. Laziness. I know that skinny people can be lazy too, but its a different kind of lazy. This lazy comes from knowing if I do it I will feel uncomfortable (for any reason, too much exertion, have to get dressed, whatever the reason). Its kind of like going sledding. I chose to be the photographer instead of participating. If I went down the hill in the sled I would have to walk back up the hill. I did go down the hill after everyone was done. I was worried I was going to cause sparks .. ya know like in Chevy Chase's Christmas Vacation. I didn't cause sparks, but you could definitely see my trail.
  10. I don't have a lap. My grandson can not sit on my lap. I hold him differently. I can't write using my lap. My laptop can not go on my lap. There are tons of things skinny people with a lap can do that I can not do.
  11. Sitting in a booth. The waitress says.. Is this ok? I say.. Let me see if I fit. Alot of times I fit. Sometimes a little squished, but there are times I just can not fit in the booth. I have to look at the booth. Does the table move? If it moves can the person I am with fit on the other side if I move the table? Skinny people do not have to worry about these things.
  12. Going to the movies. There is one movie theater in town that has smaller seats. I have to wedge my fat ass into the seat. Even in the other seats I can fit. I can even put the arm rests down on both sides, but I have to lean to the side to put the arm rests down. And hopefully the person I am sitting next too doesn't mind getting cozy because I will be in very close proximity to them.
  13. Bras/clothes. Ya know the jokes comedians tell about guys and their underwear. Thats how I am with my bra/clothes. It doesn't get replaced unless I absolutely have to replace it. Chances are that even after loosing weight, I won't be able to find a proper fitting bra in town. But at least I will be able to order them online.
There are tons of other reasons I hate being fat, but this is a good start on my list.


  1. I hope whatever you do makes you happy.

  2. There is also another reason. Last month an old high school friend was going to be in Las Vegas. That is less than 2 hours from me. I knew this friend would not judge me on how fat I was. I knew he wouldn't care, but I cared. As soon as I found out he was coming, I thought.. well I will just not eat for a month and drop 50 lbs. Well that lasted um.. half a day!

    I was too embarrassed to have him see me the way I was. I made up an excuse that I could not afford to make the trip down to see him.

    I have since fessed up to him, and he was sweet enough to understand.